Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Read your Bible

Every so often, the notion occurs to me that I should read the Bible. I've never read it. I grew up going to an Episcopal church every Sunday, but I never had to read it. I don't even know if I own one.

The reason I sometimes think I should read it, is because of all the cool Biblical references there are for someone who is familiar with that book. Many of the great writers of prose, poetry and song throw out Biblical references so easily it seems they have the whole book memorized. If I read it, I could add phrases like, "don't forget to smear blood on your door before turning in, " or "this is worse than that godawful 40 days in the desert," or "take that, Judas, you sniveling little prick" to my writing and daily language, and I would actually know what I was talking about.

If history is to repeat itself, this Bible reading notion will pass quickly, and I'll stick with Esquire's "Funny Joke From A Beautiful Woman" as my literary intellectual catalyst.

4 Comments:

At 11:58 AM , Blogger Plimco said...

I've...(I can't believe I'm admitting this)...never read the bible either. Not cover to cover. I tried. Several times. I've read Genesis like 15 times. Church every Sunday. President of the youth group. Acolyte. Choir. Wednesday night church during Advent and Lent. Baptised. Confirmed. Never read the damn Bible.

You should start with Song of Solomon. It's a whole book that reads like jokes told by sexy ladies...

 
At 6:26 PM , Blogger Ivy, the Great and Powerful said...

eh, if you ever want a Bible, let me know. I have a minimum of 7 Bibles. I can't bring myself to get rid of them, it seems disrespectful, but I really don't need SEVEN of them.

 
At 9:25 PM , Blogger DJ Farris said...

I drop in on your blog every now and then, you've got a funny realistic look at..well...just life! haha good luck with the business..yada yada...i think we all need to read the Bible more, so thanks for the reminder!

 
At 8:30 AM , Blogger SistaSmiff said...

Next time I come to the Mothership, you are getting you a Bible, dammit. I will deliver it personally and may even just have "Knucklehead" engraved on it.

 

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